Pablo seeking a date in 2016

Sunday, January 28, 2018 :: Tagged under: culture personal essay. ā° 6 minutes.

Hey! Thanks for reading! Just a reminder that I wrote this some years ago, and may have much more complicated feelings about this topic than I did when I wrote it. Happy to elaborate, feel free to reach out to me! šŸ˜„

My reactions in 2015 after starting to date again.

My 2012 profile was a lot more cringeworthy than what's here.

šŸŽµ The song for this post is Hypnotize, by Biggie Smalls.šŸŽµ

Karen and I played a game yesterday with a few friends: dramatic readings of our OkCupid dating profiles, read by the someone who isn't either of us. As part of owning my own data (I missed this and had to reactivate my profile to access it) as well as sharing a bit of myself, here was What Pablo Wrote To Find A Partner in July 2016.

Some parts are redacted. I may un-redact them later, but that's not certain. If you want to see it, message me! I'll probably share. Hyperlinks and emoji are preserved. Some of those links point good places, I encourage clicking them.

My self-summary

I used to be an actor, now I write code. Either way, it's scripts and love, all day, every day.

I'm a bunch of other places if you wanna dig further:

Death to simple narratives.

What I'm doing with my life

Isn't that the question. Trying to drink life in big gulps while I figure it out. The way I sell my labor is by managing engineers for a startup, which I enjoy on the whole, but have no shortage of Feelings about.

I recently adopted a large pair of ears with a dog attached to them; he's friendly, does what he likes, and full of šŸ”„ verve šŸ”„, so that's a big thing in my life right now.

I'm really good at

generating laffs by stitching together cultural minutiae & narratives

coding in a bunch of different languages. Java in the streets, Erlang in the sheets, baby.

being a ham, incorporating physical comedy in whatever story I'm telling

getting written up by the best news publication. A few other profiles are here and here.

charming the hell out of strangers if they initiate a conversation with me (e.g. airplane seatmates, grocery checkout lines, fellow inmates, etc.).

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

I don't take myself (or anybody, really) too seriously on the merits of their taste as an indicator of compatibility. That said, here are things I've liked:

Books: Americanah, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, we are all completely beside ourselves, by Karen Joy Fowler, Fall On Your Knees by Anne-Marie MacDonald, The White Tiger by Aravind Adiga, The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, by Junot Diaz.

Non-fiction: Banvard's Folly, The Murder of the Century (Paul Collins), Bad Feminist (Roxane Gay), The Big Bang, The Code Book (Simon Singh), Chaos, Faster (James Gleick). Malcolm Gladwell should fall into a well.

Theatre & Dance: An Octoroon (Branden Jacob-Jenkins), Rainbow 'Round My Shoulder (Donald McKayle), Kentucky (Leah Nanako Winkler), Kapow-i GoGo (Matt Cox, and a ridiculous ensemble cast).

Shows: Better Call Saul, Elementary, How To Get Away With Murder, 30 Rock. Like a lot of kids my age, I watched The Simpsons non-stop when I was growing up, so I won't subject you to this treatment, but know that I could.

Food: Anything spicy, or where avocados were harmed in the making of it (I do like how avocados taste, but I mostly just want them to suffer).

Music: It'sā€¦ a lot of different things. Notables include Thelonious Monk, Public Enemy, Tito Puente, Duck Sauce, Coltrane, and Celia Cruz. My main playlist jumps between Jazz, Hip Hop, Bluegrass, Rock of various flavors, Pop, House, Soundtracks, Metal, Guatemalan Folk, the odd classical tune, and all those one-hit-wonders you groan at but secretly love. This song and this song tickle the hell out of me.

Games: Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, Final Fantasy Tactics, the Professor Layton series, Super Smash Bros. Melee, Tetris Attack, Super Hexagon.

I used to play a fair bit of competitive StarCraft 2 and Dota (Zerg, and positions 4-5, for you who play šŸ˜„).

Six things I could never do without

Twitter and my RSS reader

my dog, who's a deer, named Sapo ("frog" in Spanish)

my boy Coffee Dad

a performance outlet such as dancing/acting/karate

Thelonious Monk recordings

mechanical keyboards

I spend a lot of time thinking about

... intersectionality, inclusivity.

... culture, media, the news, and my surroundings, in light of the above.

... ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ, ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ. Power dynamics, ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ.

... how to balance safe, ironic distance from topics vs. feeling/experiencing them openly, presently, more genuinely.

... why did The Flintstones have a Christmas episode?

... dog stuff, software stuff, theater stuff.

On a typical Friday night I am

ā€¦ either 33%, 50%, or 100% of the guys in my Zumba or Pon de FLO class.

ā€¦ in my apartment, treasuring my recharge time.

ā€¦ with friends, catching up, having one beer too many.

The most private thing I'm willing to admit

I was an extra (fully clothed) in a kinky porn movie (happy to provide a link on request). Funny enough, I was invited to this as an OkCupid date! I'm wearing this really embarrassing bowler hat in it. In my defense, it wasn't my hat, or my idea to wear it.

I can sing this song from memory.

ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ, ā–ˆ'ā–ˆ ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ, ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ. ā–ˆā–ˆ'ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ (ā–ˆ'ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ'ā–ˆ ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ), ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ. ā–ˆ'ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ'ā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ

You should message me if

I seem like fun!

Some other data that might indicate we'd get along:


Photo of Bean Sapo. Click for full size.

My dog is collapsible.

Annalisa and I selfieing. Karen called this terrifying. Click for full size.

Sister and I muggin' on the DC metro, before seeing extended family (Nov. 2015)

Photo of Sapo and I. Click for full size.

Adopted this little comrade on 10/24/2015. His name is Sapo! He has since chewed on that sweater.

A not-passionate smile but I have nice skin. Click for full size.


Parents. Click for full size.

Ingredients for a Pablo: 1 White guy from Ohio, 1 Guatemalan who escaped Civil War.

Dog and I. I mean, if I have to deal with all the work of having him, can't I milk it for dates? Click for full size.

I like to call him my kangaroo. My grandfather calls him "chuchonejo."

Skydiving Pablo. Click for full size.

May 2012. I picked the loudest jumpsuit they had because of course I do.

Headshot outtake that I think coveys plenty. Click for full size.

Outtake from the company headshot. March 2015, hair not this long anymore.

Thanks for the read! Disagreed? Violent agreement!? Feel free to join my mailing list, drop me a line at , or leave a comment below! I'd love to hear from you šŸ˜„